Born to Vacation

Speaking of “Change”…

Forget This Staycation Idea

  • Let’s stay in town we said in June. We’ll save big bucks. We’ll see the local stuff.
  • Like the Church of Elvis
  • Or the funky 24 Hour VooDoo Doughnut Shop
  • We’ll get a buncha yard work done.  It’ll look like a golf course around here!

“Everybody Get in the Car!! NOW!”

  • I’ve had enough of the zoo, the mall, and the movies in the local park where you can’t hear the show because too many kids are yelling and fighting over hotdogs and frisbees.
  • The Church of Elvis has closed. I guess Elvis really HAS left the building.
  • Doughnuts that look like the male organ were interesting the first time, the successive times after that—they were just weird donuts.
  • If I want to see a good-looking lawn, I’ll go to a golf course.

“Use the Bathroom now, because this car isn’t stopping ’til we hit a Resort.”

  • Or a Spa
  • Or a Winery
  • Or a Beach
  • Or someplace that has “vacation” or “pampering” in its title.
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About Barb

I escaped from a hardscrabble farm in Oklahoma. I'm not sure why people think I have an accent. I miss the sunshine, but not the fried foods.
This entry was posted in A Laugh, Change, Choices, Humor, Traveling and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

53 Responses to Born to Vacation

  1. This is what I say to my co-workers and friends…”Vacation, vacation, vacation.” Life’s too short not to be happy and have fun, explore the world and enrich our hearts. Super awesome post!

    Like

  2. pegoleg says:

    I hope your vacation ended up being great. We did ours so long ago it doesn’t really count, and now I need another one. Calgon – take me away!

    Like

  3. dan says:

    http://conniptionfitsrus.blogspot.com/
    didn’t know if you got this. I reposted your chili article you requested

    Like

  4. mj monaghan says:

    Run while you can! Pull out the lifeboats and pass the ammunition.

    Did I get that right?? hehe

    Like

    • Barb says:

      You expect me to look up the authenticity of your quotes while I’m ducking and running? I was hoping you’d cover my tracks so no one would trail me.

      Like

  5. Arindam says:

    Have a great time, Barb!

    Like

  6. ansuyo says:

    A stay cation only works if all the kids are gone. 😉

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  7. Staycations have their moments, Barb, but do I take it you’ll be travelling away for holidays in the future?

    Like

    • Barb says:

      The future? Kate what are you thinking? I’m having problems planning past midnight. My big trips are looking for restaurants that stay open all night and aren’t in murder city.

      Like

  8. dan says:

    There’s not really much in America that isn’t like here. I’d rather cause an international incident.

    Like

    • Barb says:

      Dan. I shudder to think of you and cultural mess that would be caused by one of your innocent activities. The world would never be the same, even though it would all be for the sake of a good time. And that’s why the black vehicles are around your house and there’s a cryptic note in your passport: Made in America. Can’t be duplicated or sold.

      Like

  9. digipicsphotography says:

    I want a vacation in the mountains…anywhere away from bugs, heat, rain, sand and work.

    Like

  10. Lisa Nowak says:

    You know, I tried the staycation thing this week, and it didn’t really work. I think I just need to get the heck out of Dodge.

    Like

  11. Fantastic ladybirds – hope you’re having a good time really.

    Like

  12. Rose L says:

    A weekend away sounds great but unfortunately I do not own a cabin and cannot afford to rent one. *sigh* I have considered a massage and braving driving into Tigard for it.
    The Everest institute has a massage school on the 5th floor 9600 SW Oak St, Tigard, OR 97223 503-892-8112
    A massage is $25 hour for those over 55. By apt only W & TH 9-12 5-6:30 8 pm SAT 10-1
    You do have to reserve a couple weeks in advance so planning is required! You can’t beat a good massage and boy, it feels soooo relaxing.

    Like

  13. How I have missed you. And your ever so slightly bent take on life. Come back. All is forgiven.

    Like

    • Barb says:

      Bent take? Bent take? I thought life was bent and I was on the straight and narrow. Thanks for the absolution. I’ll have one of the famous Elephant Child drinks in your honor.

      Like

  14. I know what you mean about the hiking. My hubby doesn’t think it’s a vacation until we’ve hoofed it all over the city (forget traipsing in the wild). I hope you have a vacation to write home about.

    Like

  15. El Guapo says:

    WOOHOO!!! Have a blast!
    And make sure everyone does everything for you while you lie about and relax!

    Like

  16. Have a nice time, Barb!

    Like

  17. Silva Gang says:

    Cute post! I agree! Staycations are nice, but not as rewarding. And, there is still the potential to spend a ton of money on staycations, which kind of defeats the purpose of it being cheaper and more convenient. Enjoy your vacation… you deserve it! 🙂

    Like

    • Barb says:

      You know…that’s just what I said. I deserve it…but I guess there’s a differing opinion whether I deserve to stop at Myrtle’s Massage Salon or Vegas. Sheez! Who knew I was on a point system?

      Like

  18. Helen says:

    Ok…I’m with Roxie on this one…head over to the hot springs and don’t look back! Helen

    Like

  19. dorannrule says:

    LOL! This is a good one! It tells the truth. 🙂

    Like

  20. HA! When ya gotta go, ya gotta go. Have fun!

    Like

  21. Roxie Matthews says:

    You went to Voodoo Doughnuts and didn’t TELL me? And i bet you didn’t think to grab me a bacon maple bar,either, did you? You Could have gotten pampered to a fare-thee-well right in town, you know, Dosha Salon on 5th will treat you like a princess. The Coldwater Creek salon in Bridgeport is a sybarite’s dream. Or head out to Bonneville Hot Springs resort and get a hot stone massage after your mineral soak. If I had been just a bit more relaxed I would have melted into a puddle and they could have run me through coffee filter to detoxify my system.

    Like

    • Barb says:

      Well….now I see the problem. I’m vacationing with the wrong people. My tribe thinks a 50 mile hike in the backwoods is the best way to escape civilization. And the only stones I see are in a coldwater creek coming off the mountain.

      Like

  22. Al says:

    I hope you video the trip. I have a feeling this could produce more laughs than Chevy Chase’s original.

    P.S. Does anyone know the best solution for wiping bug spray off a computer screen?

    Like

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